How to deal with negative youtube comments 2023
Written by: Dexxter ClarkDealing with haters is one of the hardest aspects of YouTube as a creator.
People like to tell others that they are wrong (even if they aren’t).
It’s human nature that applies to YouTube and other social media as well.
Over the years I have learned to better deal with the comment section and developed a thicker skin.
In this article I want to help you with some psychological tricks that helped me to deal with haters.
Some of these might come across as negative, but that is intentionally.
It will give some counter weight to the negativity of the comment and hopefully will tip the scale in your favor.
Let’s first get some semantics out of the way:
What is a negative comment?
A negative comment or hate comment means something different to everybody.
A negative comment can be that someone doesn’t agree with your opinion in a respectful way.
But in this article I’m talking about haters.
People who willingly try to undermine you or try to hurt you, by any means necessary.
1. Hurt people, hurt peoplePeople that are hurt themselves, will hurt others.
The sad truth is, you should actually feel sorry for them.
If you can understand where they are coming from, you can maybe accept it a little bit more.
2. Sad peopleThere are also a lot of people in the world that have not enough IQ points, no proper education, no job, no social life, no relationship, no perseverance, no goal in their life and nothing to live for.
They spend their whole day watching YouTube videos and commenting on videos.
On YouTube they see someone being successful.
Someone that made something out of your life.
They are jealous, … and you have a comment section.
A teacher said to me once:
If they are not talking about you, you are not important.
I already said it, you should actually feel sorry for them.
At least you have something to live for: an audience, they don’t.
Even if you fail at your YouTube adventures, at least you tried.
That is more than most people can say for themselves.
3. How do you respond to haters on YouTube?Never go into discussion with people, especially when it has a negative vibe.
First of all, they are not worth it.
Second, some people are masters in finding weak spots in other people.
Try to laugh about it and brush it off your shoulders.
Don’t give the hater any hint that the comment hurt you.
Don’t try to come up with a clever response.
It is a waste of time and energy.
Don’t respond, it’s adding fuel to the fire.
Attention is exactly what they want.
Don’t play into their hand.
On top of that, you can never win a discussion.
The only way to get the most out a discussion is not getting in one.
A discussion is only resolved by a win for one party.
That means that the other party has to lose face.
A discussion won is a fan lost.
If you do decide to respond: be mature.
One of the two has the be the bigger man, it should always be the creator.
You are the professional.
4. Should I delete hate comments?Yes and no.
In some cases negativity will breed more negativity and the delete button will root out evil entirely.
But be careful, deleting can backfire.
It can spark more anger than the original issue at hand.
The hater can take the issue outside YouTube (a forum for example) where you have no eye or control over the situation whatsoever.
Since everything on the internet is there to say for eternity, you can never erase it.
This is one of the reasons that most big creators don’t reply to comments and choose to ignore.
Often ignoring is the best option, it can extinguish the flame without it coming a conflict.
Tools like TubeBuddy have a hide-button for comments.
You won’t have to see the comment anymore, but you didn’t delete the comment either.
YouTube itself has a hide feature for certain users, all comments are hidden of the user for the public, but the commenter can’t see that.
5. How to avoid negative comments?In short: you can’t.
YouTube regretfully enforces negative commenter behavior with their attitude towards comments.
In YouTube’s book: a comment is a good thing, it is engagement.
Engagement equals promotion.
People are not accountable for what they say or do on the internet.
They can post anonymously without repercussions.
How easy is it to post anonymously the most hateful things?
Haters will always hate.
The only way to deal with it is to accept this situation.
HOW you deal with the situation, is what counts.
6. It’s a waste of timeEvery second that you think about a stupid comment, is time wasted.
Time you could have spent on something useful that helps your YouTube channel.
The commenter goes on with his life and doesn’t think about it twice, and you feel bad about it.
I know, it is easier said then done, but it’s the truth.
7. It’s a power struggleAs a YouTube creator, you are seen as an authority.
From the commenters’ perspective: how awesome is it, that you know more than someone else? How badly do you want to rub that in their face? (in the comments).
If feels good to be superior, not being the underdog for a second, and see an authority figure fail.
We haven’t grown as a human species, we’re still kids on the playground that make fun of the other kid.
Sad, but true.
If you as a YouTube creator feel bad about a comment: 1 point for the commenter, 0 for the creator.
8. Impostor syndromeYou are the authority figure as YouTube creator.
People expect you to know everything.
That can make you feel like an impostor.
But remember, the teacher has to be only one step ahead of his students.
If you are wrong, don’t be afraid to admit it.
Be honest about it, that helps a lot.
You can’t know everything.
9. Switch off notifications for commentsYou can switch off notifications for comments and go only into the comment section when you are ready for it.
If you have a day off, or you don’t feel like it today, you don’t look at the comments.
It’s peaceful and quiet.
10. Turn off commentsA lot of creators have comments turned on for every video, because it helps with the promotion of their video (it is a ranking factor).
But you don’t have to.
You can switch comments on or off per video, you can also set it as default, so every time you upload a new video the comments are enabled or disabled by default.
If you really have trouble with the comments, you can switch off entirely.
Personally, I’d like to have comments on, because I’d like to connect with my fans.
I also want to be approachable.
But some videos tend to attract weirdos.
I disable the comments on those videos.
11. Agree to disagreeYou don’t have to agree with the commenter.
You can tell them that respectfully: agree to disagree.
If you acknowledge the validity of statements in the comment, someone feels heard.
Being acknowledged is sometimes more important than being right.
12. Negative comments is trustWhen you have only positive comments on your videos can be suspicious, especially as a brand.
You gain more trust if you have also negative comments.
Because, no one is 100% perfect.
Something to think about when you use the delete button a lot.
13. 99% don’t commentMost people that are satisfied after watching your video, don’t leave a comment.
You don’t hear these people because they are not vocal in the comments.
The fact that you don’t hear them, doesn’t mean that they aren’t there.
Most of your viewers are decent and intelligent people, but don’t feel the urge to comment.
It is sometimes easy to forget that.
14. 99% are good commentsDon’t forget that out of a 100 comments, 99 are positive.
But we humans tend to zoom in on that 1 negative comment, that wipes out all the other 99 good comments.
It makes no sense when you think about it.
My super tip:
Make a screenshot of every positive comment you get.
You emphasize the positive aspect.
This make you conscious every single time that a lot of people are happy with what you do.
I did the same thing, and eventually stopped because there were so many positive comments.
15. Turn poison into medicineNegative comments can also be an opportunity to make a fan out of a hater.
If you ask a hater for constructive feedback that can turn a hater into a fan for life.
They feel heard.
You might actually get some useful feedback that helps the quality of your content.
16. Negative comments are not all badAlthough a lot of bad comments have a negative connotation, they can be helpful feedback.
I’ve had a hater comment about the background music in one of my videos: it was too loud (the wording was less subtle).
I rewatched the video on my laptop, indeed it was too loud on laptop speakers.
I was hard to hear me talking.
Since then, with every video I edit, I pay extra attention to the volume levels of the music.
17. Comments can be opportunitiesLet me give you an example:
I made multiple videos about computers for music production.
I used the comments of my previous videos answer the most frequently asked questions in my next video.
This way I could extend the next video over 10 minutes, I had better watch time and more ad revenue because of that.
18. Admit you are wrongIt doesn’t matter how much research you do, mistakes sometimes slip through the cracks.
Someone will point that out it the comments, that’s a guarantee.
There is no shame in admitting that you were wrong.
You might think that you lose face, but in fact it makes you more human and approachable.
People will probably respect you more for that.
Apologizing is optional.
19. Constructive feedbackConstructive respectful feedback is rare on YouTube.
But it happens.
Personally, I always thank the commenter for being respectful about it, even when we don’t agree.
20. It’s karmaThe final tip is one of a more spiritual kind.
Haters don’t realize: you are the things you say or do (karma).
Things you say or do have the tendency come back to you sooner or later.
They basically say to the universe: come and get me.
Negativity has the tendency to attract more negativity (just like positivism more positivism).
This is what they mean when they say: misery loves company.
By responding in a negative way to a hater you are enabling more negativism in your own life.
You stoop to the same level as the hater.
You make negativity bigger than it needs to be.
If you think that it is not fair that they can say whatever they want: don’t worry, life will get them.
Everybody will get his fair share of misery in life.
But in this case: you have the upper hand: you understand something they don’t about negativism.
21. It`s psychologySomething I didn`t understand for a long time: how can you say something in a comment that can be easily proven wrong (either by science or just looking at it).
As commenter you make an utter fool out of yourself for thousands (if not millions) of viewers that see the comment.
Most commenters type before they think rather than to save face.
It is not until I stumbled upon an interesting study on human psychology.
When you tell someone that the majority of people think a certain way, he is more likely to think the opposite.
When you ask someone: “89% of people think that aliens came to earth, do you think that is true?”.
The test subject was more likely to say “that`s not true”.
When you ask someone “15% of people think that aliens came to earth, do you think that is true?”.
The test subject was more likely to say “that`s true”.
(forgive me, I don`t remember the exact controversial fact nor the exact numbers, but that is not the point here).
Only the fact that that majority said one thing, the test subject said the opposite.
The reasoning behind this is that we like to belong to a small group instead of the majority; we like to see ourselves as strong invidual thinkers.
In fact, this feeling is so strong that a someone rather likes be to wrong than belong to the majority or in this case: authority (the YouTuber).
This was a lighbulb moment for me, because I immediately understood the utterly stupid comments I got on my videos over the years.
Disagreeing with the YouTuber is not about the actual fact, but the disagreement.
In other words: the YouTuber can never win this argument.
In other words: for you as YouTuber, don`t bother engaging with these comments.
22. You can’t reason with stupidityYou just can’t reason with stupidity, you just can’t.
Not even worth your brain-space or time.
ConclusionI think that everybody deserves the right a good first impression.
Always have a positive attitude in your videos.
That starts with your thumbnail and title.
Negative first impressions will attract negative people.
When it comes to haters:
You have to make a conscious decision to not let it get to you, otherwise it will consume you and it will demotivate you.
That is a waste of all the effort you put into your YouTube channel.
If you get a hateful comment, ask yourself: where does this comments fit in my life?
Is it useful to me or the quality of the content? No?
Try to forget!
I know, that it easier said than done.
When you are serious about YouTube and want to take it to the next level, take a look at my video training program: Viral Strategy.
The program takes you step-by-step through the process of getting views, subscribers and going viral.
For new creators I included a module that guides you step-by-step through the process of starting, creating and setting up a YouTube channel.
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